Chemo didn't happen yesterday. We went in for all the pre-admission blood work and physical, then waited for 6 hours for them to come back and say that they didn't have a bed available. As we were packing up and leaving, the nurses kept thanking us for being so patient and keeping a good attitude; behind my smile and "No problem! We'll see you tomorrow!" I was so frustrated and exhausted. I have to steel myself for hospital life and especially for chemo and it's effects, and each time that the plan changes, I am left feeling like a deflated balloon, all my energy zapped away by waiting rooms, phone calls and anxiety.
Then, 20 minutes away in evening commute traffic, we realized that Scarlett's port was still accessed (the needle and IV line were still attached). It's not unsafe or a big deal, really, but we had to stop and call in just to make sure we didn't have to do anything special, since we've never taken her home accessed before. They assured us she would be okay overnight; it saves her from being stuck again today.
I am battling within myself to be honest and tell them how I feel when this continues to happen, and to be patient, knowing it is not their fault that there are so many sick kids. They know it is hard for us; they do what they can to make me comfortable, but I am not the patient. Scarlett is doing well compared to many who are there, so I tried to be grateful that I got to sleep in my own bed another night.
We're waiting for the call that a bed is available tonight. It is harder to be there over the weekend because all of our regular doctors, who we trust and who know us, are not in, so questions get bounced around. Plus, Chris has to work closing shifts all weekend, so his time in the hospital with us will be scarce. Hopefully everything will go as scheduled once we get there...but I'm not betting on it.
Thanks to Tammy and Jacqueline Sawyer for bringing over a delicious dinner! Thanks to Lauretta McCarthy, who brought dinner, and topped it off with wine and cheesecake! We feel very lucky (and full!).